Monday, November 16, 2009

Towards a dough architecture

From Readers' Forum, New Zealand Herald, 16 November:
In paintings of early Auckland, a windmill is shown on one of the hills. This must have cheered the hearts of new settlers coming into port here. After long weeks at sea, they would be hungry for fresh food, especially bread.

In remembrance of our heritage, what about a huge stylish, gloriously welcoming opera house in the shape of a windmill for Queens Wharf? Engineers cold programme its sails for certain hours, so children and adults could go down and view them.

Apart from the sails area, where possible it should be made of reinforced glass, so that by day or lit up by night, it would be magical and friendly sight for tourist ships and aeroplanes.

On the inside, acoustic engineers could provide superb sound for singers and orchestra in a world-class opera house. All this in a wonderful harbour setting.
E.Rosser, Remuera
It is surprising that nobody had thought of this idea until now: a glass illuminated opera house in the shape of a windmill, with programmed wings. It would be world-class. After all, we must have an opera house, because Sydney has one. We can't have a Gehry, because Bilbao has one already; so how about a world class piece of tat so vulgar that even Jeff Koons would flinch? Yes, that should do it.

Leaving aside the obvious differences between opera houses and windmills, as well as the horizontality of the one building type and the verticality of the other, why would anyone have a thought as hideous as this one?

Further reading: The True History of Partington's Windmill

7 comments:

Uroskin said...

And call it The Windmills of Your Mind?

Robyn said...

I would love to see a mock-up of what this would look like. In fact, I'm almost tempted to get my coloured pencils out and have a go myself.

Also, there is a fantastic opportunity for a Baker's Delight to operate in the Windmill Opera House.

Keri Hulme said...

Hmmm.
Why not just a little (less than 250 metres tall) hive shape in charming shades of grey?Doesnt matter about materials or anything. Windowless is best. Could be waspish? Or bee-ish? Or orc-ish?

Hornets? Well, Act people really are like hornets, so they might enjoy agglomerating within?

Humble bees? Native bees? Well, *they* dont build hives, so who cares about them?

Jake said...

There's an alternative guide to Auckland Architecture to be written, based on crackpot design ideas the have found their way into letters columns over the past 20 years.

Rusty said...

It would capture the spirit of the City of Sails quite nicely.

simon said...

Auckland had electric trams in nineteen-fucking-ten?!

Stephen Stratford said...

There is an opera by Massenet called "Don Quixote" based on the Cervantes novel. It may contain windmills. It would be perfect as the opening show.