What I did on my holidays

Mostly, I have been reading Margaret Atwood and listening to the The Pursuit of Happiness and the Tragically Hip. This has been a Canadian Christmas, without the snow. Normal service will resume after 4th January. Until then, postings might be subject to unforseeable interruptions.

Wishing all gentle readers a good new year.

The price of tyranny is eternal vigilance

The Sensible Sentencing Trust is urging New Zealanders to be extra vigilant and crime conscious to restrict opportunities the holiday period presents to criminals.

Trust Spokesman Garth McVicar said historically the holiday period presents unique opportunities to criminals, "which goes hand-in-hand with a dramatic escalation in all categories of crime."

"The silly season with the increased consumption of alcohol and drug abuse combined with financial stress traditionally sees an escalation in domestic violence and child abuse. Christmas should be a time for everyone to enjoy – particularly mothers and children – so we are encouraging the public to report any screaming or loud abuse. If we can save just one life it will be worth it."

"Criminals are on the prowl at this time of the year looking for opportunities to burgle your house or steal your car or some other valuable."

"People should think like a criminal, don’t leave easy pickings, ensure your house is locked and windows secure with alarms checked and set."

"The Police can not be baby sitters; the public must step up to the mark and be accountable and responsible for the community we live in."

"This is not just about our own well-being any more; the cost of crime in one way or another is having a drastic impact on every one of us."

OBSERVE – RECORD - REPORT

"We are urging the pubic to be the eyes and ears of the Police, don’t turn a blind eye to even the smallest infringement of the law. If you see or hear suspicious activity, observe, record and report to the Police."

"It is time we accepted our responsibility and asked not what our country can do for us – BUT – what we can do for our country."

Regards,

Garth McVicar
National Spokesperson,
Sensible Sentencing Trust.


I am not making this up

The Maisonettes:

Cruel and unusual

The Sensible Sentencing Trust is "outraged" that yet another white collar criminal has escaped a jail sentence. Anthony Bowden, a Director of failed finance company Five Star Finance has been sentenced to nine months home detention and 300 hours of community work. Under the Securities Act he could have faced a five-year jail term.

Sensible Sentencing Trust supremo Garth McVicar said today: "this sentence is a slap in the face for hard-working kiwi battlers. This man and his colleagues cheated ordinary New Zealanders of their savings, taking money invested by trusting mums and dads and gambling with it, to a tune of fifty million dollars. They should all do time in jail, and even that would be too good for them.

Warming to his theme, McVicar continued "ordinary New Zealanders have been swindled time and time again by these crooks in smart suits, who make unrealistic claims to attract investors who have little knowledge of the finance industry. Tragically, many of the people duped by Bowden and his like have lost all their savings and are facing poverty for the rest of their lives. We have seen far too many of these finance companies collapsing because of the greed and outright dishonesty of their directors"

"Community service for Bowden makes a mockery of the law. He will do a few simple tasks at his leisure; then he will claim the experience has made him a changed man. Meanwhile, his victims will be relying on charity this Christmas and for many to come."

McVicar, a simple farmer from Hawkes Bay before he became a crusader for justice, ended his press release by demanding custodial sentences for white collar crooks: "only the full force of the law will deter other accountants from becoming swindlers. People like Bowden should do time, so that decent Kiwi people will be free from these parasites."

No, he didn't say any of that.
I made it up.
Sorry.

Prefab Sprout, back in the day, for Sas:

Telling lies for money

Colenso BBDO executive creative director Nick Worthington added: "I don't think a beer brand wants to be the guardians of history, we want to tell great stories."
...
DB Export marketing manager Dave Shoemack said: "We simply wanted to create a commercial that told the DB Export story and that is exactly what we have done."

No, you did not. You made it up; both of you. There are stories which are true, or at least are attempts at truth. There are stories which are false; this has been one of them. This story is untrue because it is presented as history but the events it describes did not occur.

Or, to put it another way, why do this advertising people think they are telling great stories when they are telling lies? If you met some bloke in the pub who told you a story like this one, you would call him a liar. Yet the people who make the piss and the people who market it for them think that telling a lie is telling a great story.

There is no point in complaining about it: the industry is self-regulated, the Advertising Standards Authority being run by the advertising industry. It has lots of codes, including one for liquor. However, the subject of telling lies is not covered by this or any other code. If it were, much advertising would break the code. It would not make much difference, since the ASA has no power and no intention to do anything.

And thus it is that people lie to us in order to persuade us to buy their products. Alcoholic drinks in many respects are very harmful products, yet advertisers are allowed to tell lies to sell them, and justify their lying as telling stories.

"Look mum, I'm a story teller now; I'm on top of the world."
"No you are not son, you are a liar. And get off that gas tank."

Pic unrelated. There has been no rainfall inside the Later with Jools Holland studio since records began. However, the Charlatans are not taking any chances:

Pillars, facades and cantilever racking

The Sydney Opera house is located in Sydney, Australia and was built at the behest of Queen Elizabeth the Second. A Hungarian man, who never felt his efforts were properly acknowledged, designed it. At the time of his death a couple of years ago, however, he was acknowledged by the Australian public, with news programs carrying the story of his death and the effect his creation has had.

This is the best essay about Australian architecture with particular reference to cantilever racking ever written. Not only does it challenge the commonplace belief that Sydney Opera House was designed by Jørn Utzon - a Dane - but it posits instead the authorship of an unnamed Hungarian. Covering such diverse topics as the SBS building and big sculptures, the essay concludes with a tantalising glimpse of the life of one Connor Sullivan, who bought both not only cantilever racking but also wire partitions.

Blessed by Google

The fact of Google being in possession of vast amounts of the world's literature may be just a little bit troublesome, especially for authors (who are expected to work for nothing in so many circumstances) who should not be expected to relinquish control of their books or to accept Google's rather vague promises about revenue sharing.

That said, the fact of Google being in possession of such amounts of digitized lit does lead to interesting possibilities. One such possibility has now been realised: Ngram, which makes stats of words.

Let's try it out with a small experiment. Henry Wootton, in his 1624 translation of Vitruvius' De Architectura wrote:

Well building hath three conditions: firmness, commodity, and delight

Let's see how these terms have fared since then. Well how about that? Delight peaked early, within 50 years of Wooton's use. A slow recovery in the 18th century was followed by steady decline in the 19th and 20th. Losing its lead in 1975, it has since recovered. The other two, Commodity and Firmness, have been duking it out in the lower reaches, with not much market share for either to show.

But then, it is not a race. So let's see how the whole phrase "firmness, commodity and delight" has prospered over the years. A volatile player in this market, I think you will agree. After rapid rises and precipitous falls, a steady climb peaked in the 1980s and the phrase has slowly declined.

On the other hand, you might get a different result; the technology is not yet stable. So, let's try one further test and display the results below:

Crime story

The Herald today publishes an account torture of a 9-year-old girl by her parents that is so dreadful that I could not quote any of it here. It is difficult to read the story to the end. So why does the Herald feel it necessary to illustrate the story with a mawkish stock photograph of a battered teddy bear? Is the reality of this child's suffering not enough? Does the Herald think its readers will only be moved to pity by a carefully set up photograph which clearly is designed to manipulate the viewer's emotions?

And am I the only one reminded of Drop the Dead Donkey?

Meanwhile, new evidence shows that middle-class crime anxiety is largely unfounded:

More than half of all the crime in New Zealand falls on just 6 per cent - just over one in 20 - of the adult population, a survey shows.

And if you're a young, poor, brown city-dweller, you're much more likely to be a victim of crime that an old, rich, white person living in the country.

An old, rich, white person living in the country, Mr Garth McVicar, was not consulted for this story. In fact, it seems that nobody wants to hear from Garth these days. It seems that his clemency towards David Garrett has hardened cynical journalists against him. Garth's media-friendliness was further unenhanced by his demand for the Police Commissioner to be sacked, in the middle of the Pike River disaster. And perhaps his latest media release will confirm our suspicions:

The Sensible Sentencing Trust is criticising the sentence handed down to convicted killer David Bourke, saying it acts as encouragement, rather than a deterrent.

Bourke's been sentenced to two years 10 months prison for the manslaughter of his brother Timothy, and for shooting at Police officers, but he's eligible for parole shortly.

His lawyers argued successfully that Bourke was provoked due to relentless pressure from his suicidal brother.

Trust Spokesman Garth McVicar says the sentence is a slap on the wrist.

So Garth thinks people might be encouraged to assist the suicides of their siblings because of this sentence; yes, we were right, he really is just a nasty old man. And of course, he has create a file on his database for Mr Bourke. The quality of mercy is not strained.



Speaking of crimes, how could this be allowed to happen?

Pro-life, but not as we know it

In a shameful political ploy at the expense of young girls, last night the House of Representatives voted against a bill that would help prevent child marriages worldwide. After unanimously clearing the U.S. Senate with 100% bipartisan support, the International Protecting Girls by Preventing Child Marriages seemed on its way to be passed by the House and signed into law by the President. It will not become law this year.

The objection, led by House Republicans leaders, appears to have had nothing to do with substance – the thousands of lives that could have been positively impacted by enactment of the legislation – but everything to do with politics. Key Republicans drummed up opposition to the bill by concocting arguments about the high costs of implementation. However, the bill was actually an effort to make existing U.S. foreign assistance expenditures more effective. The bill would have targeted existing resources toward community-based efforts, like those of our partner APAD in Cameroun, which supports survivors of early and forced marriage to become economically independent. Importantly, the legislation would bring hope and opportunity to millions of girls who now face a life of poverty, violence, ill health, and possibly death as a result of being forced into marriage at an early age (including some as young as eight years old). The opposing Representatives also made false accusations that the legislation was a backhanded way to support pro-choice non-governmental organizations.

From Akimbo. What can one possibly say?

Democracy in action

Another reason to stay away from Britain:

The government is attempting to pilot through legislation that would bring in five-year parliaments, due shortly in the Lords for its second reading. Ahead of this, the Lords constitution committee says in a report published today that they are "unconvinced" by the arguments for moving to a fixed-term parliament.

The group includes constitutional expert Lord Norton; former cabinet minister Lord Crickhowell; Lord Renton; Lord Powell, adviser to Margaret Thatcher in Downing Street; former Lib Dem leader in the Lords, Lord Rodgers; and the former lord chancellor Lord Irvine.

And how many of those were elected to their positions? Why, none, of course. They are political appointees, for the most part. So now they can question elected members of the House of Commons about plans to make the British elective dictatorship more like a democracy.

Fortunately for the members of the House of Lords, the British subjects of Her Majesty are utterly incapable of making rational judgments about anything that appears to be traditional. All the wigs and ermine, as well as all the faux-Mediaeval architecture (observe, if you will, the wallpaper and carpet in the office of Chris somebody the something Secretary; no, me neither) form a cone of silence around the Palace of Westminster (see: it's a Palace; it is not like any ordinary assembly). So, nothing really happens. Of course, the House of Lords now contains some eminent personages of non-British origin (or,as the locals call them, wogs) who were appointed to their positions after several years' service on Radio 4's Start the Week.

Incidentally, Andrew Marr, host of said programme, told the Cheltenham Literary Festival:

A lot of bloggers seem to be socially inadequate, pimpled, single, slightly seedy, bald, cauliflower-nosed young men sitting in their mother's basements and ranting. They are very angry people.

Of course, he is quite right; for this reason, I never attend blogging conventions.

Britain, under legislative changes introduced during the premiership of Tony Blair, is a police state. However, Britain can no longer afford a police force, having spent all its money on banks and "defence".

Other features of modern Britain include TB and homophobia.

New adventures in aesthetics

In its ruling a Flavin work is described as having “the characteristics of lighting fittings…and is therefore to be classified…as wall lighting fittings”. As for Viola, the video-sound installation, says the document, cannot be classified as a sculpture “as it is not the installation that constitutes a ‘work of art’ but the result of the operations (the light effect) carried out by it”.

Everything you know about art is wrong. The European Commission says so. You spent all that time reading all that Theory, stuff like:

The artist radically limited his materials to commercially available fluorescent tubing in standard sizes, shapes, and colors, extracting banal hardware from its utilitarian context and inserting it into the world of high art. The resulting body of work at once possesses a straightforward simplicity and a deep sophistication.

Oh no it doesn't. It is only lighting. This really is a breakthrough in the philosophy of art. All this time, we thought artists like Flavin were making art out of everyday materials, transforming them from the realm of the mundane to that of the aesthetic. But the European Commission denies any such change has taken place. For the purposes of customs and excise, they are just things.

As for Viola, his work only becomes art when it is plugged into the mains. We thought he was discovering video as an artistic medium, as previous generations of artists had discovered oil paints and other media. We thought his art made connexions with the work of those earlier artists, in his use of gesture and of the body. But no, we were wrong. The art is no more than a by-product of the video machine, which is taxable at normal rates.