Tuesday, May 22, 2012

How they brought the bad news from Dymchurch to Bromley

My sister and I had a very disapointing visit to the Neptune yesterday. The barmaid was devoid of any customer skills. She only answering our queries of food and coffee in an abrupt way. Not at all friendly and never smiled once. She made us feel like we were inconveniencing her. We ordered coffees and one ham and one cheese baguette to be told there may not be any ham - although there were quite a few meals on the board that included ham!!! We paid nearly £15. The coffee which came from a machine was putrid. After waiting for almost 40 minutes and enquiring how much longer, to be told in an abrupt way by the barmaid "she, is doing it"! As we were the only customers, I found this quite unbelievable! Eventually, two small (both finely grated cheese - no ham) baguettes with a measly helping of lettuce, tomato and transparent cucumber. I said the the barmaid that it was quite discusting for the price we had been charged and she said "thats what a baguette is"!!! At this point, we just could'nt wait to get out of there. The music was blaring, the pub was grotty and the windows were filthy. We should have followed our instinct when we pulled up in the car park as my sister commented on the state of the window and said "I think the pub has shut down". But, having spent a lot of time in the area last year my sister and I had visited the Neptune several times and had many lovely meals there. We had also recommended the place to friends and family. NO MORE.! I do not see my sister very often and having decided to drive to Dimchurch from Bromley was a completly wasted day!
Quite. I like especially the barmaid's retort, "thats what a baguette is."  I remember the Neptune Inn quite fondly as one of the many pubs between the Saxon Shore and the sea where I misspent my youth,  and because recently I met someone who had worked there a few years ago; she told me tales of its decline. It used to be quite nice.

In other news from Dymchurch, here are some Lavatory videos (surprisingly SFW but also quite peculiar) including one from the same Neptune Inn. Meanwhile, film fans can enjoy an exhaustive description of the various retellings of the story of Dr Syn.

Finally, late news: Robert Browning is 200.

More Go-Betweens:

1 comment:

Russell said...

Your post reminds me of my last trip back to the country of my birth.

My beloved and I went to get a coffee in one of those hotels where everyone picks their hire car up from when they arrive at Heathrow.

Should have known better. Worst cafe experience ever. Miserable Irish bitch behind the counter didn't know what a flat white was. Shit coffee. Shit sandwich (not literally). Shit seats. Shit experience.

We were obviously horrified (as one would be) and immediately left for the West Country, where we received the upper middle class treatment that we are used to .